Whatever you’re telling yourself about your power to make choices in your life, stop now… suspend your beliefs, suspend your ‘shoulds’ and your ‘musts’ and your ‘have tos’…. and consider these possibilities…
How is it possible to Master Your Present, Past and Future, all at the same time?
Just imagine for a moment that you’re in your car and you’re driving. This is your Present and you’re in control, you’re in the driver’s seat and you’re taking all of the decisions. As you drive, you reach an intersection, you can choose route A, route B or route C. You can, of course, also turn back, it’s up to you.
While you’re at the intersection, contemplating which route to take, you might remember that one of the routes leads to a place that brings up unhappy memories from an event that happened years ago; you might be tempted to avoid that route. This route represents your Past. You might rightfully wonder how is it possible to wisely master your Past. Just for the purpose of this exercise, bring to memory one of those events which give you a mild negative emotion. Let me ask you… do you have a problem with what happened in the past, with that event from the Past, or is it possible that you have a problem with the way you feel about that specific event in the Past?
This is the magic moment where you feel empowered because you realise it’s not the Past, it’s what you feel about the Past, and what you tell yourself about the Past in the Present, what really is the problem. Would having positive feelings or no feelings at all instead of negative emotions over that event change the way you perceive the Past now? If course it would! And while you cannot change the event in the Past, you can change your negative feelings and the things you tell yourself about that event.
Now come back to the intersection… depending on your destination, you pick the road you want to take, signal, make sure the road is clear and you pull off into the direction you want to go. Reaching your destination is an event in the future, whether it’s your place of work you’re going to reach in the next 10 minutes or a holiday cottage which is 3 hours away, the event of getting there is in the future, and it’s part of your Future. While you’re still at the intersection, or even before that, choosing that destination and getting there are a decision and a series of actions you take in the Present; and you can choose to get there, or not – you could have always chosen another route.
Now take this metaphor and apply it to any context in your life
Job & Career – What choices are you making now? What negative feelings from the Past, what ‘shoulds’ and ‘musts’ are influencing your Present choices (ie. feel stuck or not good enough to ask for more money / apply for a better position in another company)? Do you have compelling career goals you’re working towards?
Business – What choices / changes / or no changes at all are you making in your business? What negative feelings from the Past, what ‘shoulds’ according to the ‘should police’ are influencing your Present choices for the future(ie. feel uncomfortable about charging more for the value you’re providing because you were ‘taught’ as a child that money is dirty and people with money aren’t honest)? Do you have compelling, specific, measurable business goals you’re working towards?
Health & Fitness – What choices are you making now? What negative feelings from the Past are influencing your choices in the Present (ie. avoiding running in the park because feels bad to be less fit compared to other people running in the same park)? Have you set compelling goals around health and fitness and are you working towards achieving them?
The choices we make in the present and the goals we set for the future are influenced by our Past. Of course they are, they are influenced by the background we come from, the education we received, the way we perceive the world, the previous choices we made, by our values and beliefs, by the skills and abilities we acquired. Deleting the negative emotions attached to some of these Past events and viewing them in a positive, resourceful light empowers us to set compelling goals for the future and make better decisions now, in the Present, and to take massive action to achieve our goals.
What’s next?
Once you realise the power you have in the Present, to wisely Master your Present, Past and Future, you can no longer word the excuses you previously told yourself without being aware of them, without realising that it’s your responsibility to have this attitude of empowerment and being in control of your life.
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